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Juicily Humorous Connections

By Peter Lloyd

Quantum mechanics, I’m told, describes strange, counterintuitive entanglements between subatomic particles. I distrust folks, however, who can’t do the math yet make even stranger correlations between the behavior of random, everyday objects and events. But then…

“Everything is connected,“ the holistic detective Dirk Gently reminds us. Applying his holistic techniques, he solves murder mysteries in the wonderfully funny and too few Dirk Gently television programs from the BBC and the legendary humorist Douglas Adams (right).

So what am I left to do but test the quantum holism of real-world connections? Take a look at the following ad slogans.

We bring good things to Life!
The quicker picker upper.
Don’t leave home without it.
Like a rock!
Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.
When it absolutely, positively has to be there overnight.
Be all that you can be.
Reach out and touch someone.

What do they have in common? How are they connected? Give up? Try thinking of them as Viagra slogans. No responsible product marketing manager would suggest using such quirky lines, but you and I appreciate, I’m sure, the humorous connections.

Other slogans work just as well for Viagra. Many more almost work. Some work only if you substitute the original brand name with Viagra. Others work so well, but so crudely, I decided against calling them to your attention here. But if you want a few more laughs, visit Sloganeeze and run through a random list of slogans with the Viagra connection in mind.

Adams would be right to chide me for making too much out of such apparent interconnectedness. He once sarcastically imagined a puddle of water thinking,

This is an interesting world I find myself in—an interesting hole I find myself in—fits me rather neatly, doesn’t it? In fact it fits me staggeringly well, must have been made to have me in it!

Viagra and dozens of other products just happen to connect with the underlying Seven Creative Juices that attract people to products. Lust, the Juice driving the consumer need for Viagra, just happens to be very powerful and universal. So it shows up everywhere!

One or the other and sometimes several of the Creative Juices drive all human behavior. Hip to this, advertisers consciously and unconsciously come up with slogans that resonate with basic human drives. The same Juices motivate all creative work.

Coda

For another load of insight from surprising connections, think of religious hymns containing the name Jesus and substitute Prozac.

Peter Lloyd worked for more than two decades in the advertising business as a writer and creative director for small and large agencies and eventually on his own as a freelance writer.

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