Ammo for the Uncreative
By Peter LloydEven if you're among the most uncreative, you have the tools to stifle innovation, invention, and new ideas that constantly threaten your comfort and security.
I'm not talking about mealy-mouthed nitpicking. No, sir. Most creative people are clever enough to deal with that. When a really hot idea is about to upset your apple cart, you need strong ammunition. And I'm going to give it to you.
1. What's wrong with the old way? As soon as you're handed a new idea, toss that hot potato right back in their laps. This technique will those clever creative whippersnappers scurrying. And nothing is more satisfying to an uncreative bully than the sound of creatives whimpering like a bunch of ninnies.
2. Has this idea been killed before? There's no such thing as a new idea. Find out how the innovation you've just been presented was shot down in the past, take aim, and fire! The most powerful weapon of the uncreative is an old objection.
3. Appeal to common sense. Especially if you have a sympathetic audience. Your mediocre minions will cheer, vice presidents will applaud, and your fellow uncreatives will kiss your feet.
4. Ask who it will hurt? Don't ever take a creative idea sitting down. Rally the opposition. The change-o-phobic are everywhere! Wake up everyone who stands to lose. Stir up those sticks-in-the-mud. Then watch those creative dogs lick their wounds.
5. Rip their clothes off. Creative people always have something up their sleeves. (That's why they wear baggy clothes.) Find those anticipated award, raises, promotions, and expose their creative need for approval. "You're just out for awards. We want sales!" gets them every time.
Of course, if you can, you want to nip creative initiative in the bud, before it bites you in the butt. So be proactive. Shower creatives with phony promotions. Constant lip service works, too. Don't forget to regulate. Standardize. And above all, measure, measure, measure! What creative person can argue with numbers?
A word of warning. Be careful. You can stifle creativity, but you can't kill it. No matter how hard you try.
Peter Lloyd is co-creator with Stephen Grossman of Animal Crackers, the breakthrough problem-solving tool designed to crack your toughest business problems.
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